Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Digging the Past...for a Better Future

When I decided to stand and fight, I knew I had a big reason. So the reason was when I decided to keep a chronology of what happened. Now, that's me, purely me who has to abide by the dates and events. I am talking about what I did yesterday afternoon.

Months after the happenings in my life, I feel like a phoenix reborn out of the ashes of my old self - a better, wiser and stronger person. Without remembering and acknowledging my past, I won't know how to celebrate this feeling [thank you]. Hence, I got down to "Project Past". I dug through the calender, inboxes, mails and my mind (the biggest data-chip) and started ravishing through the rush of the events. Thank God, I wasn't dead for sometimes, everything is still afresh and warm in my thoughts.

Instead of the frustrations and remorse [I felt then], I felt a little kiddish at some of the hedious things, like the nasty mails archived in the inbox. I wasn't keen to read through again, so I copy-pasted the whole stuff in a very seemingly chronicle manner. Eight pages of events was not bad. I quite enjoyed revisiting some of the moments, especially those where I must have thought I were as good as being bad. Anyway. 

Admist, I remembered to call the lawyer who helped me through the phase. His surprise tone indicated it's not everyday that he receives a 'thank-you-note' from his clients. But I had to thank him for instilling the power of right in my fight. 

After I printed and mailed the chronicle to my mailing addresses, I got a sudden jubilant feeling. Perhaps, I was justifying the conviction my family and friends have in me, that "You are a strong woman." Honest, I like to be called that. I like to be judged as someone capable of standing for what's right. A shame if I were to thread on a path much to the dislike of my own existence. 

This attempt will refurnish my future. One day, my children will read this and realize how their parent/s fought through to stand tall against the injustice in life. One day, I will look back as I sit on the rocking chair and thank life for the lessons that made me rejoice every happiness, every tear. 

You can change anything, but the truth. 


  1. Why dont your post those 8 pages here for our reading pleasure and for your children to read some day, I know you will lose it if you dont archive it online somewhere.

  2. Ha-ha. It sounds like my past is on sale :)

    I will, I will. One day...for now, it's safe in the archives!

  3. Interesting post, Luzee. Better future with the help of the past - a good idea to recycle things and make better use. :)

  4. Thanks Langa, nothing like being positive at every given angle, else you know how it is.

    I am amused with the word "recycle". He-he. Loved it.