Thursday, August 30, 2012

A Child of My Own

I became a mother at 15; Lilly was born in 1998 when I had just begun my 9th standard. Her presence in the house was a total joy, we all loved having a little soul around us. From the day she reached home from the hospital, I took it on to myself to be her surrogate mother - bathing her, changing her diapers, feeding and all other miscellaneous tasks of bringing up a child.

Then came Lucy when I was in my first year of College. I still remember walking back to the hostel after reading the mail from my brother stating the arrival of the second. It was December 2001 and I needed to wait few months before I could come home for break. Sadly, with Lucy I couldn't spend much time except those annual breaks in the four years of College. But she being an independent child in herself grew very amiably. 

2006 and our little Man R was born to my sister and brother-in-law. Immediately, he became the cynosure of the family. The girls were super excited to have a younger sibling. The 18 months he was with me, I enjoyed every day taking care of him. Today, we look back to the memories and can't really believe that our Mr. R is already in Grade II. Of course, the distance between us is immaterial, everyday we exchange number of calls, mostly to update about what R is up to. He is one of a kind and we miss him very much.

2009, I became mother to my Hubby's ten year old. Leksh hid behind a chair when I walked into the house. She was shy but that shyness didn't last long. In due course of time, she and I were to share a wonderful relation, even more beautiful than a mother-daughter. One time I asked if she minded my presence and she said, "I wanted to meet you even earlier." Ya right, KP and I began dating since 2007. 

With this handful of lovely kids in my life, I have almost forgotten that I haven't thought of having one of my own. I am so occupied tending to them: cooking for the girls, buying parcels for little R and worrying about their studies that in my spare time, I just collapse and drift into a long slumber. Until someone asks me, "No child of your own?"

That sets me to wonder if something is missing in my life. Yes, I would love to have a child of my own, someone I can always call my own creation. The kids will be excited too, all of them are that sociable-love-kind-of children and they are real care-givers. I am not scared of these children walking out of my life later, but the fact remains that they are not from me, but a part of me somehow

Then I say, "No worries mate, we are working hard." (Is that some kind of hard work?)

4 comments:

  1. Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go avwalking around outside your body.~Elizabeth Stone

    (I am sure you will realize this when you have achild of your own).

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  2. Nice quote :)

    Am sure to realize the beauty of it when I become a mother :)

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  3. All the best. My prayers for you n ur hubby to have a beautiful child that u can call your "own creation".

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  4. ~Blushes~

    Certainly, you all will be updated when we are blessed with one :) Thanks for your kind wishes. Keep sending us your prayers and wishes.

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